I’m sure most of you have asked yourself this question at some point. Is it right if I do this or that? Am I going in the right direction? Am I choosing the right path? Is this the right thing to say? Who says what’s right or wrong? How do we know if something is the right thing to do or not? We just don’t! We have to take risks in life in order to know if something is good or bad for us. There is no magical solution to what is right.
I was in a situation where I didn’t know what to do in life. I didn’t know what direction to take. I was wondering what would be the right thing to do; continue studying and become the best psychologist or just take a break and discover the things that might interest me. After my Erasmus as an exchange student in the Netherlands I knew for sure that I wasn’t prepared to continue with the career path I chose. I felt so anxious about not knowing what I was going to do next in life, but I knew I needed to explore more and find what I really wanted. So that’s exactly what I did! I wrote down all my interests, skills, and desires and I concluded I had to travel and explore the world. I had to follow my inner voice and figure out on my own what I really want from this life to build my identity and learn about myself.
For the past two years I have been taking the chances that have been presented to me whether they were risky or not. I always thought, ‘Why not?’ So I did all kind of things, starting off by quitting my job without knowing what I was doing next. (Scary feeling!) Two weeks later I got a job offer as a dancer, which was exactly what I imagined and had on my vision board. I then got the opportunity to learn different artistic skills I never imagined I would do, such as acrobatic ´portés’, aerial silks, dancing with fire, walking in stilts! I was up for anything! I also had numerous opportunities to try new things that took me out of my comfort zone such as engaging with random people, surfing, getting tattooed, etc! Although it felt scary at first, I always knew that I would regret not trying it first as I could always go back to my comfort zone. There were moments I felt a bit irresponsible, but I literally did everything that life was offering at me. I don’t know if I took the right or wrong decisions, but I felt I was in control of my own journey and certainly learned a lesson from every choice I made. There was something inside that kept pushing me forward in life. The more I did, the more I wanted to experience. I felt empowered but insecure at times, I must say.
I learned that taking chances is the right thing to do. I took the leap and immediately planned a few trips around Europe. I got the chance to spend quality time on my own. It took a few months to learn how to enjoy my own company. It is inevitable to compare yourself to others when taking chances that are changing your life. Everyone around me seemed to have a stable and planned life and it seemed as if they were doing the right thing in life. I couldn’t identify myself with their lifestyle. I thought something must be wrong with me but I learnt to ignore the negative thoughts and took the courage to move forward with the decisions I had made. I got to know myself better, things I liked or didn’t. I observed myself, how I interacted with others, how I dealt with stress, what I was up to doing or not. It felt rare at times and seemed like I didn’t belong anywhere. That felt strange, but good at the same time. (Contradictory, I know!) I think being lost is the perfect way to find your way in the end. Not sure if it’s the right way or not, but doing whatever I felt in that precise moment, listening to my inner voice, makes me feel good and feel I am in charge of my life.
“There comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but he must take it because conscience tells him it is right.” Martin Luther King Jr.
Taking risks and listening to yourself and doing what you decide is right, can improve your self-esteem. This is a really important point. When you don’t do the right thing you don’t feel good about yourself. You can feel disappointed, empty and negative about life. Your self-esteem can touch the bottom line because whatever you are doing doesn’t fulfil you. Not doing the right thing will make you feel unsuccessful and will block your way on experiencing positive things. I believe you have to focus on yourself, spend time alone and think about what you want. Take action and do what you believe is right in that moment. Your self-esteem and self-confidence will enrich.
Moreover, we must understand that not everything we experience has to be amazing. There are also negative things happening but you try to get the best out of it. Everything we experience teaches us something. By this I mean that doing what you consider the “right thing” may not always produce peace. Listening to your inner voice may not always be the right decision. You can suffer and not enjoy the moment as you imagined or felt it would. But that’s Okay, that’s part of living, you experience good and bad.
I figured these three key points that lead you to feel that you are doing the right thing for yourself;
- Listen to inner voice. It may seem like you are having an unrealistic and crazy thought. But if it feels that you must do something out of your comfort zone…take a risk and go for it! Listen to yourself.
- Review the reasons of why you are willing to do it. What are the possible losses or successes in your action? What are your goals? Review each thought you have and figure out the purpose of it.
- JUST DO IT. Go for it! We fear to failure but if you never throw yourself out there you will never know about the uncertain success. If you don’t try to go for your goals and objectives you will not know if it was the right decision. The right is to do what you are feeling inside either the outcomes are positive or negative. As Kathy Valentine says, “If you have to do it, then you’re doing the right thing.”
Be curious! Trust your feelings and your intuition. Do what really comes from inside! Take the risk to listen and experience… because no matter what way you choose you learn and build from good and bad! You will be surprised along the journey, just enjoy it!
Let me know your thoughts about this blog by commenting in the section below! Thank you!